Human good.

Just when you are convinced humanity is looking bleak with corruption, immorality, and greed, you see a bit of good.

There is a multi-network, multi-city, multi-nation telethon tonight on all
major networks called Hope for Haiti. Tons of celebs and other public figures. It massages my heart to see GOOD in people. I truly believe that even without a religious moral compass, people still desire to do and be good. And I love that the Good is all those things that Jesus was...kind, compassionate, loving, full of hope...

I promise my next post will be about something other than Haiti. I know there are those out there ready to move on. But this is what has continually been on my heart. I find it a difficult privilege to be broken by this situation...thank you Jesus for softening my heart, even though I hurt.

better.

feeling a bit better.

i feel a little LESS paralyzed knowing that the major need in haiti is medical...and that the airport is having a hard time getting enough doctors and food in, much less just randos (like me) who want to help.

my heart is still compelled to pray. HARD. which is the best i can do. i do know that should opportunities arise in the future, i would like to go there. also, tommy and i have verbalized the possibility of looking into getting disaster relief trained (through Red Cross or other organizations) to be available for future crises.

a friend from Baylor, Katie Wilhoit Kilpatrick, and her husband left to serve in Haiti about a month ago. here is their account from the past week...http://www.benandkatieinhaiti.com/

luckily they are safe, but need LOTS of prayer. they are serving as fully as they are capable and grappling with their future options.

it intrigued me that about 2 weeks ago, katie posted a list of songs that were speaking to her currently. one of those was Shane and Shane's "Embracing Accusation" (go download this song now if you haven't heard it). i feel the message of this song is such truth for this time, in that place. in the midst of such devastation many people ask "how could God let this happen?" unfortunately, there aren't any answers for why bad things happen in this world, why there is disease, hunger, and poverty--except for the fact that we live in a sinful, broken world. Yes we live in darkness...BUT the truth, the final refrain, is that JESUS SAVES. He is LIGHT to the dark, dark realities of this world. it's not because of him there is evil, it's because of him there is HOPE.

Oh the devil’s singing over me

An age old song

That I am cursed and gone astray

Singing the first verse so conveniently

He’s forgotten the refrain

Jesus saves!

on GOING.

For some reason my heart has been rocked by the devastation in Haiti currently. A 7.0 earthquake hit the capital, Port-Au-Prince, yesterday afternoon, the largest earthquake that has hit them in over 200 years. To quote news broadcasts, "the country was ill-prepared for this disaster". An estimated 3 million are estimated to be affected by this quake. Now, genereally my heart would go out in prayer to situations like these, but today my heart is saying GO, GO, GO.

I really have never before had such a compelling desire to go. I want to go be in the dirt and debris with these people. Help them search for loved ones. Sing with them in the street at night (as they have reportedly been doing). I want to tuck little ones in at night, who have no idea where mommy or daddy might be.

I want to hug this woman, and weep with her for the plight of her country.

As I have searched the internet for "ways to help," the overwhelming option is monetary aid. Why? I hate feeling constrained. It has compelled me to ask myself "why am I not ready to go?" There are so many options out there...placing yourself on disaster relief volunteer databases, being a part of Salvation Army and other relief organizations, even if by association. But I'm not. Therefore, I'm not ready. And it pains me. I am ashamed that when the Spirit compels me, I am constrained by my options. Maybe, by a miracle of God, my church will announce a team that will organize for this purpose. Or maybe, I will get up the guts to really consider making this heart cry a reality and proactively seek some information. Right now, that seems scary. Just being honest.

Pray for Haiti. And if you can, GO.

a little message...

Remember in college dorm days, it was the cool thing to have a dry erase board on your door? And people would leave little messages like, "Alli is da bomb" or "dinner in Collins at 6?" (or the random boy from Penland would go around and write profanity on everyone's boards)

Well, sometimes I wish people had these little message boards on their front doors. And as I'm walking my dog past I could jot down little encouraging messages like "pretty wreath" or "your dog is cute" or "don't forget to pay the rent!"

And to our upstairs neighbors, "um, please stop having really loud sex at 3 am. thanks."